Clara C asked:
I know it’s a horrible question, so I can do without the moral judgements. My husband thinks that everything his family tells him is 100% truth. Without divulging any specifics, one of the current situations that causes angst between us is his mother’s claim to be broke, which his brother attests to. His brother who was given power of attorney to be and for his mother in the event she was ever unable to make decisions of any sort…medically and financially…A decision that was made and executed over 10 years ago without the courtesy of ever telling my husband.(we found the document included in some other forms given to us by my mother-in-law). I explain that, as 1 of many examples of the secretive manner in which my husband has been excluded from important legal changes and an accurate understanding of his families estate. My father-in-law who passed approximately 3 1/2 years ago was a veteran and prisonor of war in WW2 and to the best of my knowledge had a term life insurance policy that he had from the age 40 until his death at 80. No mention was ever made to the policy and there have been recent claims that she is broke. He was laid to rest at Arlington, which incurred no cost to the family. In addition, during this same period in time she was the executor of a friends estate who had no living relatives and no will(a wealthy man) and sold a rental home for a considerable profit. I would like to prove to my husband that her financial distress is invalid and find information regarding his fathers life insurance policy. I’m not a bad person, I just want my husband to open his eyes!!! Dear Spock- Thank you for your eloquent, concise and complete answer. It is true that his eyes aren’t going to be opened with ease, that is why I was looking for some proof documenting the impossibility of her claim. Any other avenues you know of that are public record that will somehow help in convincing him that he is in the dark regarding her financial standing? I’m all ears!
I know it’s a horrible question, so I can do without the moral judgements. My husband thinks that everything his family tells him is 100% truth. Without divulging any specifics, one of the current situations that causes angst between us is his mother’s claim to be broke, which his brother attests to. His brother who was given power of attorney to be and for his mother in the event she was ever unable to make decisions of any sort…medically and financially…A decision that was made and executed over 10 years ago without the courtesy of ever telling my husband.(we found the document included in some other forms given to us by my mother-in-law). I explain that, as 1 of many examples of the secretive manner in which my husband has been excluded from important legal changes and an accurate understanding of his families estate. My father-in-law who passed approximately 3 1/2 years ago was a veteran and prisonor of war in WW2 and to the best of my knowledge had a term life insurance policy that he had from the age 40 until his death at 80. No mention was ever made to the policy and there have been recent claims that she is broke. He was laid to rest at Arlington, which incurred no cost to the family. In addition, during this same period in time she was the executor of a friends estate who had no living relatives and no will(a wealthy man) and sold a rental home for a considerable profit. I would like to prove to my husband that her financial distress is invalid and find information regarding his fathers life insurance policy. I’m not a bad person, I just want my husband to open his eyes!!! Dear Spock- Thank you for your eloquent, concise and complete answer. It is true that his eyes aren’t going to be opened with ease, that is why I was looking for some proof documenting the impossibility of her claim. Any other avenues you know of that are public record that will somehow help in convincing him that he is in the dark regarding her financial standing? I’m all ears!
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life insurance information is private, so no help there.
now, if your husband is named as a residual beneficiary in his father’s estate, he has the right to demand an accounting of the estate and, impliedly, to see the books and records. That’ll only help if the proceeds of the life policy you think existed were paid to the estate — it’ll be useless if they were paid to the individual [his mother].
his mother’s work as executrix of the will of another person is/was overseen by the probate court responsible for the case. it is the court’s job to assure that all the estate’s assets were fairly handled and that none enriched the executrix beyond the fee approved by the law.
As an uninterested party, you have no standing to inquire into this, except in so far as the law allows any person to ask. [which amounts to "is the work complete?" and "have the required forms been properly filed?"]
you may report suspicions that this estate is being improperly handled to the probate court — but you won’t get to hear of the results unless criminal charges are filed.
***
btw, you can’t open your husband’s eyes if he doesn’t want to look. won’t work.
There are a couple of things you can do. But there are no guarantees.
You can try MIB. All life insurance gets processed through that company. But there is no guarantee, but it might be worth the money to try it because it does not cost that much. A link is below. The 2nd link is to the Department of Insurance. Just click on your state. I don’t think they can really help but who knows.
The other thing you can try is to go to your local country courthouse and search court records. It might help to know what state or county your in for referrals or just yahoo or google search the courthouse records for that area.